Do you believe in people with common interests? Do you connect only with people with a common ideology?
Ancient Greeks called this homophily. In common words, you can call it a ‘Liking of the Similar’.
This might be surprising. But in most instances, we are Attracted to Deviant Personalities. Especially in very personal choices, we tend to like the extremes.
Consider the recent trend in social media, cinema & OTT. A character needs to express aggression to garner more fans. Aggression is trending everywhere. Common folks love to become aggressors.
Aggression #trending
Who are these aggressors today?
Those who believe and practice the extremes.The extremes of violence, lust, loot, and deceit.Interestingly they also taste their success very sooner than later.In some cases, their shadow of aggression grows bigger than themselves.
In 2020, I had a weird reference when working for a conference on Thirukkural. My work was to find some relevance in kural and unbalanced emotions of young people.
My friend who was a legal practitioner briefed me on the life of a 19-year-old boy. This young lad had been arrested for a series of heinous crimes. He was reprimanded. The incident was a gory murder. He was quizzed about his motive for such a crime. The response I knew about gave me shockwaves. In short, the young boy had developed a sense of pride in committing such a crime.
He is said to have believed that there is a style statement in completing such crime(கெத்து in his own words). He seemed to have enjoyed those murders. He believed there was a style in building money and pleasure through these crimes. Pleasures of
• Lavish lifestyle • Drug(locally called Powder), • Drinks • Sex
My friend was anguished when he shared with me that the young boy kept on boasting about his lust. His lust was for more pleasures and more toxic pleasures. Though he knew these pleasures would ruin him, he got attached to those unnatural pleasures.
KAAMAM
Sharper and shorter let’s stick to the base of lust.The lust for sexual pleasures.Though Kaamam- காமம் can be considered as a loose translation for lust; the word Kaamam has a bigger context.A context that reflects more emotions and is not limited to sexual pleasures. Still, there’s no better word I know. Hence let us fix on the word Kaamam.
பால்: காமத்துப்பால் அதிகாரம்/Chapter: நாணுத்துறவுரைத்தல் / The Abandonment of Reserve
Valluvar rightly guides everyone here, those men-women; boys and girls; family and single folks; to all and everyone, he gives a clear warning. Once the floodgates of lust get opened it destroys all those safe boats (virtues)of life; the safety boats of valor, personality, and legitimate shame.
Every virtue gets decimated by one’s lust.
Victimised Women
The exact way of life, a life of lust that crores of children are being inflicted with. Especially the wrath of female children is beyond imagination. Violence against women and girls remains a global issue.
A pre-pandemic data from a UN body says around one-third of women worldwide have experienced physical and/or sexual violence by an intimate partner, and 18% have experienced such violence.Infact no part of the world is different in this practice.
In the most extreme cases, violence against women is lethal: globally, an estimated 137 women are killed by their intimate partner or a family member every day.
While female genital mutilation is becoming less common in some countries, at least 200 million girls and women alive as of 2020 have been subjected to this specific form of violence across Africa and the Middle East where the practice is most prevalent.
In a sign that attitudes are changing, women’s acceptance of being beaten by their partners decreased in almost 75% of countries with data over the past seven years. However, laws to address domestic violence are not yet universally available, with only 153 countries having such laws. Gaps are largest in Northern Africa, Western Asia, and sub-Saharan Africa, where 43% and 35% of countries respectively have not passed such laws.
In India, the POCSO Act is one of the most complex laws that attempt to save children from any kind of harassment. In a country where sex education even for adults giving a well-informed education to children and adolescents has been a non-starter in our country’s context.
Most children and parents do not know that the law protects them even from undesired gestures. But the sense of Zamindari–Minor Maapillai‘s mindset is still common in our society. I once interacted with a group of working young men who desired to claim their masculinity by quantifying the number of female adolescents they were able to attract for their sexual desires.
I’m informed that Indian laws enable any girl child to protect themselves to the extent that they can extremely harm an offensive person for their defence (IPC96–106 : The new BNS may have same changes). The key here is letting this generation know that Lust or Sex is indeed a pleasure, but it needs greater ethics and understanding.
Where does Valluvam stand on handling this sense of pleasure? We will find more with Valluvar.
3 responses to “Lust, Loss & Valluvam – ‘NoCringeConnect’”
K.V.ஜெயசீலன். கொடமாண்டப்பட்டி.
பெண்குழந்தைகள் பாலியல் வன்கொடுமைக்கு
பலியாவது உண்மையே. தங்களது கருத்தும்,
ஆதாரத்துடனான கருத்துள்ள பதிவும் மிகச் சிறப்பு.
ஆனால் அதை முற்றிலும் நீக்க கல்வி பாடதிட்டத்தில்
இதை ஒரு பாடதிட்டமாக சேர்ப்பது மிகவும் பயன் தரும்.
தற்போது வரும் திரைப்படங்களும் தீவிரமாக தணிக்கை செய்து வெளியிட வேண்டும்.
3 thoughts on “Lust, Loss & Valluvam – ‘NoCringeConnect’”
K.V.ஜெயசீலன். கொடமாண்டப்பட்டி.
பெண்குழந்தைகள் பாலியல் வன்கொடுமைக்கு
பலியாவது உண்மையே. தங்களது கருத்தும்,
ஆதாரத்துடனான கருத்துள்ள பதிவும் மிகச் சிறப்பு.
ஆனால் அதை முற்றிலும் நீக்க கல்வி பாடதிட்டத்தில்
இதை ஒரு பாடதிட்டமாக சேர்ப்பது மிகவும் பயன் தரும்.
தற்போது வரும் திரைப்படங்களும் தீவிரமாக தணிக்கை செய்து வெளியிட வேண்டும்.
Aravind Bharathi
உண்மை – நிச்சயம் அதற்கான தேவை உருவாகி வருகிறது
S.B.Gita
Eager to know where does Valluvam stand in these sense pleasures. Looking forward to your next post Aravind!
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